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Cultivating Patience When You Are Still In Love With Your Ex

By Herbert Ho


Wanting to regain the love of someone that you feel very strongly for is an honorable goal. Wanting to love and be loved is a human need, after all. None of us wants to spend our life alone and only a few times in your life do you meet someone that you truly connect with.

Acceptance that your old relationship is over and looking to the future is the key to your happiness. How do you move on with your life yet remain optimistic that things will work out between you and your ex?

There are many different problems that happen in a romantic relationship that can lead to a breakup. Sometimes we make mistakes that we later regret. Perhaps our partner becomes the target of someone else's charming ways and flattery and they are lured away from us. Other times life gets in the way of our relationship and problems with family, friends, money, time and general problems in life cause us to drift apart in our relationship.

Realizing how doubtful you are is the first step towards taking care of this problem. Realizing that you have bad thoughts inside your head and that even though you want to be positive and optimistic about everything, you still have doubts in your mind is a good first step.

While you might wish that your ex would come back to you immediately, it rarely happens as quickly as we might like. Have you noticed that the harder we push and the more we concentrate on winning back the love of someone dear to us, the further they drift from us. The more desperate we are to win back the affections of the one person we love, the more they reject us. This is why you must be patient. You must understand that it might take a little bit of time for the dust to settle from your breakup and for the healing to begin. If you are constantly asking your ex to come back to you, the answer will always be no.

Taking advantage of this time apart from the one you love can also be helpful. You might actually find that you can take care of issues in your life or make changes in your life that you might not otherwise have the time to do if you were with someone. Being in a relationship can take up a lot of time in your life. Having the freedom to be alone with your thoughs is sometimes helpful. Having the time to achieve goals that you simply didn't have the time to achieve is important. Maybe you had always wanted to start a small business or take some college classes. Now is the time to do these things before you find yourself back together with your ex.

Be sure in your heart that you are worthy of the love that you desire. Feel it in every part of your being. You deserve to be loved by that one special person. It's natural. If you truly love your ex then you will be patient and understanding. You can put your own needs aside and take advantage of this time alone to work on yourself. Spend some time thinking about things from your ex's point of view. How would you feel if you needed some space and time to figure things out in your relationship but your partner was being selfish and kept on pressuring you? Give your ex all the space and time they need and then surprise them when they do check to see how you've been doing.

Take some time and grieve. Allow yourself to experience that pain but put a limit on the grieving process. Once you begin to feel better about yourself then you'll know that it's time to get to work. Soon it will be time to focus on yourself, your needs and your life. Once you begin to care for yourself and love yourself, you will find that you become more attractive to other people in your life, including your ex. The faster you get past the grieving process and on to rebuilding your life, the sooner you will find that your ex will come back to you. Remember that it's always when we're busy with other things that wonderful things happen. When you least expect it, your ex will walk right back into your life.




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This article collected, selected and written by: Author Van Hoc

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